Project White Flowers commences documentation

I have written 50-something pages on my script but I am still structuring and struggling with dialogue. I decided to document my progress for future reference after I started reading Robert Rodriguez' Rebel without a Crew.

How do I feel about the book?

I am intimidated. He had 10-years of shooting and editing his own way. That experience is invaluable. He also has cast and crew in the form of siblings. I haven't had people I could count on for more than a single day at a time. Two days in a row? Don't even think about it. That's how I am gonna play my movie. Using people for single days only and feed them and show them the door. Unless someone actually takes their acting/production career seriously, we can work out something. He also mentioned Orsen Welles made Citizen Kane at 25 and Spielberg made Jaws at 26. I feel pressure that I need to break through within two years.

I am reassured. I watched several more expensive productions and I have a mind like a sponge at the age of 23. I feel I can do everything they did, I just don't want to climb their stupid hierarchy. I am the anti-Hollywood, I will not do things their way. Rodriguez' book speaks to me. It's like he's 23, making his first movie as well, talking to me. I am poor like him, crewless like him. I am ambitious.

I will see his El Mariachi and raise him by my movie, "Project White Flowers." Obviously, that's not the real name. This is the work of my life though! I will succeed and see it through.

First step will be to get some index cards (for free because that's how stingy I have to be) and write my scenes down and rearrange them. I am lacking a lot of things. I take notes whenever I imagine scenes in my head and I hear the perfect one-liners or imagine the best action scenes. Anyway, I am learning slowly, but I'd like to have a complete draft of my script by the end of this month. To take a cue from Rodriguez, the best way to learn is to throw myself into the fire.